top of page

๐“๐ž๐ฆ๐ฉ๐จ๐ซ๐š๐ซ๐ฒ ๐’๐ญ๐จ๐ซ๐ฆ๐ฌ ๐š๐ง๐ ๐๐ž๐ซ๐ฆ๐š๐ง๐ž๐ง๐ญ ๐‹๐š๐ง๐๐ฌ๐œ๐š๐ฉ๐ž๐ฌ.

ยท

In the middle of a crisis, the mind plays a cruel trick. It whispers that this difficulty is all there is, and all there ever will be. A conflict at work feels like a career in ruins. A fight with a loved one feels like the end of the relationship. A financial setback feels like a lifelong sentence to scarcity. In our pain, we lose a vital perspective. We forget to ask a simple, grounding question: ๐ˆ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ฌ ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ฎ๐ž ๐ญ๐ž๐ฆ๐ฉ๐จ๐ซ๐š๐ซ๐ฒ, ๐จ๐ซ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ข๐ญ ๐ฉ๐ž๐ซ๐ฆ๐š๐ง๐ž๐ง๐ญ?

This question is a lifeline. It is the difference between drowning in a wave and knowing you are in a passing storm. It is the most useful tool we have to sort our pain into categories we can actually manage.

A temporary issue is a storm. It has a beginning, a middle, and an end. The stressful project with a final deadline is temporary. The recovery period after an illness is temporary. The intense exhaustion of caring for a newborn is temporary. These issues ask for our endurance. They ask us to ask: ๐‚๐š๐ง ๐ˆ ๐ฐ๐š๐ข๐ญ ๐Ÿ๐จ๐ซ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ฌ๐ž ๐œ๐ข๐ซ๐œ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฌ๐ญ๐š๐ง๐œ๐ž๐ฌ ๐ญ๐จ ๐œ๐ก๐š๐ง๐ ๐ž? ๐Ž๐ซ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ซ๐ž ๐จ๐ง๐ž ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐š๐ฅ๐ฅ ๐š๐œ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง ๐ˆ ๐œ๐š๐ง ๐ญ๐š๐ค๐ž ๐ญ๐จ ๐œ๐ก๐š๐ง๐ ๐ž ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ฆ? We marshal our resources, we seek support, we focus on the fact that this, too, shall pass. We just need to make it through the storm.

A permanent issue, or a long-term one, is a change in the landscape. A chronic health diagnosis is a new landscape. The loss of a person, or the end of a foundational relationship, changes the landscape of a life. These issues are not storms to outlast. They are new terrain to learn how to navigate. They ask a different question: ๐‡๐จ๐ฐ ๐œ๐š๐ง ๐ˆ ๐ฅ๐ž๐š๐ซ๐ง ๐ญ๐จ ๐œ๐จ๐ฉ๐ž ๐ฐ๐ข๐ญ๐ก ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ฌ ๐ซ๐ž๐š๐ฅ๐ข๐ญ๐ฒ? ๐‡๐จ๐ฐ ๐œ๐š๐ง ๐ˆ ๐›๐ฎ๐ข๐ฅ๐ ๐š ๐ฆ๐ž๐š๐ง๐ข๐ง๐ ๐Ÿ๐ฎ๐ฅ ๐ฅ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ž ๐ฐ๐ข๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ฌ๐ž ๐ง๐ž๐ฐ ๐›๐จ๐ซ๐๐ž๐ซ๐ฌ? This is the work of adaptation, of building new strengths, of finding a different kind of peace.

Our suffering deepens when we confuse the two. We try to simply "wait out" a permanent change, growing bitter as it does not pass. Or we collapse under the weight of a temporary storm, believing our resilience is gone forever.

So when the ground feels unsteady, pause. Ask the question. Is this temporary, or is this permanent? Your answer will not remove the pain, but it will show you the path through it. It will tell you whether you need to hunker down for the storm or whether you need to learn the language of a new land.


Comments

Rated 0 out of 5 stars.
No ratings yet

Add a rating
bottom of page