𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐍𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐥.

A child does not learn what is right. A child learns what is normal. And for a child, normal is a simple thing. It is what happens at home. It is the background rhythm of their days, the unspoken rules that govern the people they trust most. They are silent, constant observers, and every action they see is a lesson in what the world is and how one should behave in it.

When a parent interrupts another person while they are talking, the child learns that this is normal. They learn that your point is more important than another person’s voice. They learn that listening can wait.

When a child sees a parent speak sharply to a server in a restaurant or dismiss a house helper without a word of thanks, they learn that this is normal. They learn that some people are less deserving of basic courtesy. They learn a hierarchy of human value based on a role, not a person.

When they watch a parent scroll through a phone during a family meal, they learn that this is normal. They learn that divided attention is acceptable. They learn that the people in front of you are in competition with a screen.

These are the powerful, silent lessons of childhood. It happens without a lesson plan, without a single lecture. It is absorbed through the skin, through the eyes, through the constant exposure to what is simply done. The child assumes this is how all people are. This is how the world works.

The revelation comes later. It comes when they visit a friend’s house and see a family that takes turns speaking. It comes when they see another parent help a stranger and realize kindness can be given freely. It comes when they sit at a table where everyone is fully present, and they feel the warmth of that undivided attention. In that moment, they understand that their normal was just one version. Their normal was just for their family.

This is the profound question for every parent. It is not what do you want to teach your child. The question is, 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒅𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒏𝒐𝒓𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒛𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒅?

Do you want to normalize respect, even when you are frustrated? Do you want to normalize patience, even when you are in a hurry? Do you want to normalize honesty, even when it is difficult? Do you want to normalize kindness, even when it is offered to someone who cannot offer you anything in return?

Our children are watching. They are building their own normal from the raw material of our behavior. They will carry this normal into their own friendships, their own families, their own world. Let us be intentional with our normal. The future they build will be a reflection of the world we showed them was possible, one quiet, ordinary action at a time