Discovering our parents in ourselves when grooming the next generation



Recently, I was telling someone in their twenties how to handle a particular problem in their life and I had a sudden sense of deja vu. But with a slight twist. I had heard what I was telling the younger person being told to me by my dad when I was in my twenties. I had uncannily used similar words, arguments and perhaps gestures to convey the idea to the young man.

When I remember the time my dad had told me, I had taken it semi-seriously but now I realized I was passing the same information to the next generation and unsurprisingly they were taking it sceptically too.

How many times has it happened that you suddenly discover your parent in you? In the way you walk, talk, say something to the next generation. What we have learnt stays with us at least some part of it. When we heard it from our parents or watched them do something we have absorbed it unconsciously and it comes out of us at the appropriate time.

Sometimes I have heard my sisters talking to their daughters and the way they tell it is exactly like how my mother told them including the last tonal inflexions! I am like Deja-vu again! It is not just facial resemblances, I know people who walk exactly like their parents and I wonder is that genetic or learned? When I see some gestures or words which are common to parent and child, I am often surprised though I should not be. It is not just the physical appearance that is passed to the next generation through genes but also things that are learned.

Have you ever discovered your parents in yourself?

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